27 Jan 2015

Of telur and ikan keli

Assalamualaikum wbt

Nama pun dah macam kelakar kan.
Yes, it is funny,
And shocking,
And confusing,
And many more feeling that I can’t even describe.

So, today, as usual I went to DS for dinner,
And that’s it, kena tengking sebab telur and ikan keli, haha.
The second thought makes me wanna laugh and cry simultaneously,
I can’t eat DS’s ikan keli sebab the smell of it kind of making me dizzy after consuming it,
So, last semester, I wrote my name in the list of people who have alahan and tak boleh makan some DS food,
And, dah ditakdirkan Allah, I got scold today,
Because my name was not on the list,
I was shaking at first sebab kena tengking depan orang ramai kot,
And the kesiannya-syaza-sight that the others gave me makes me feel sick,
I wanna cry more, lol.

But, Alhamdulillah, Allah bless me with some patience,
 Even I was having mixed feeling when I was standing in front of that mak cik,
I still can think rationally, and I am grateful for that.
I gave the omelette that was already in my Tupperware (another mak cik DS placed it in my Tupperware right before I got scolded, thanks mak cik, I love you)  to a junior, who was so kind, she even asked me if I wanted to share the omelette with her, but I said it’s okay,
I gave it to her, and took what I supposed to eat for dinner tonight, isi my air, and then blah.
And of course I cry when I reached my room, lol ;)

I cry not really because of the mak cik DS,
She was the only one yang macam garang sikit pun, yang lain are really nice to me and to others,
And I don’t think I cry because I tak boleh makan telur malam ni,
I don’t think I cry because of kena marah dekat tempat umum, I think I am okay with that,
Bengang sikit ada la kot, haha.

But, I cry thinking of the power of the almighty Allah,
Allah, kalau dia cakap it’s not our rezeki, then it’s not,
Tak kira la dalam bentuk apa sekalipun.
The omelette was already in my tupperware kot,
And boleh je kalau nak lari bawak masuk bilik, haha
But, I chose not to,
Because it is not my rezeki J

Thanks Allah,
For everything that has occurred to me,
Be it good or bad,
Thanks for my very supportive friends (mek au datang bilik kot asking whether I am doing good, probably she watched that event too,haha. Thanks mek au J )
Thanks for the very nice junior of mine,
Thanks for the rest of mak cik DS yang memang baik2 pun selama ni, I will be starving if it is not because of them cooking for me
Thanks because turning me into a stronger Syaza J

it's okay to be a freak upon one's eyes...just don't be one upon ALLAH's

15 Jan 2015

Rant on result

Assalamualaikum w.b.t

So, yeah I got like tones of assignment needed to be done,
But, I can't resist to rant, that I promise myself I will have a blog post right after I finished my first paragraph of TOK essay, so here it is....

The result for Semester 3 final examination was out today,
I barely made it, or I am  afraid not yet.
The are lots and lots of people, I mean my batch-mates who did very well,
I could not help it but to ponder upon my own achievement

I did progress upon time, 
But it has been a struggle for me, 
Since the very beginning, the very early moment here in KMS,
I had failed, many times.
But, I bounce up every time when I hit the bottom.
I cry my heart out,
And sometimes the tears dried on its own,
I am not strong, I am very fragile inside,
And I am not afraid of saying it out loud,
Because saying that I am afraid, actually give some courage,
for me to keep moving on,
and never look back..

And the fact that I am able to keep standing tall today,
is because of Allah the Almighty,
and the strength of Rasulullah s.a.w which never fail to inspire me,
and my parents who never give up on me,
and my friends who are always, always there for me,
telling me that I can do it, that believe in me like no one else,
and last but not least, my teachers whose prayers are really meaningful to me,

Thanks for making my journey here in KMS a beautiful, bittersweet ride :)

it's okay to be a freak upon one's eyes...just don't be one upon ALLAH's

13 Jan 2015


Assalamualaikum w.b.t

I almost forgot the feeling,
Of being celebrated and to be wished,
Until this very day.
And for that,
I thank you.
All the three of you *even I know only one will be reading this, heheh*
And for others that keep me in your prayers,
Even I might not know who you are,
Or I might not seem to appreciate your present,
Know that I owe you something that I could never repay,
And no one will be able to do so, but Allah,
May Allah bless you, wherever you are.

Turning 20 this year, there are so many things that I want to accomplish,
And I hope Allah will grant me the time and the strength to keep going on,
And I hope that my time in this merely duniya, will not be wasted,
For it is the thing I regret the most 
I hope my parents will be proud of me,
Proud to call me their daughter,
And I know they are.
They are proud of me, no matter how rebellious or nonsense I am.

And for that, I am thankful.

it's okay to be a freak upon one's eyes...just don't be one upon ALLAH's


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